Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
You ruined the universe
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
