I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
