She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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