Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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