Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Randomize