The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
