Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
