your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
