Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
