yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
