i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
