THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
i now understand why vodka
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
