Umm I'm too high to move.
I want to have your abortion
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
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