I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
