does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Are we still banned from the library?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
