Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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