do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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