dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
