So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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