Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
