the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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