haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize