Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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