somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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