Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
