Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
