My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
she pinky promised me she was 18
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
