I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
