I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
