My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
