I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
