i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Randomize
