Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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