eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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