I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize