goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
