whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
