i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
So many bounce houses so little time
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
