So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
