haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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