I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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