I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
did i walk over a car last night?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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