Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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