my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
