I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
