:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
