Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
