I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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