found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
