I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Randomize
